Blinken Assassinated…Again? This Time in Ukraine

Antony Blinken was allegedly shot dead outside Barman Dictat, a Kyiv bar, Saturday night after imbibing too much alcohol and causing a drunken commotion, FSB Agent Andrei Zakharov told Real Raw News.

Blinken, who had practically lived in Ukraine since 2021, was no stranger to the buzzing Kyiv nightlife. In May 2023, he had been at the same bar serenading the crowd with his rendition of Neil Young’s “Rockin’ in the Free World” while strumming a red guitar. At the time, he was reportedly in Kyiv to give Volodymyr Zelenskyy a check for $61 billion, part of the regime’s foreign aid package, but found time for merriment and gaiety—albeit in the company of a joint US-Ukrainian security detail.

Zakharov said Putin dubbed Blinken the “musical murderer” after viewing a video of the intoxicated minstrel’s performance at Barman Dictat, a fitting addendum to his notorious “war criminal” status. Putin, Zakharov said, had gotten the tape from undercover FSB agents tasked with tracking Blinken’s movement in Ukraine and looking for an opportunity to kill him—without getting themselves captured or killed.

Blinken visited Barman Dictat six times in 2023, Zakharov said.

“The filth Blinken was bankrupting your country, giving the pig Zelenskyy all your money, while waging proxy war against my country. We watched him many times, but he had much security so we didn’t act then. On Saturday we learned he back in Kyiv to tell Zelenskyy—you know what? That Kamala Harris would continue Biden’s work and fund him for at least 20 years! How she can make that promise? Our men noticed Blinken this time with only three security guards—two Security Service of Ukraine and one American- but I don’t know which agency. Our men followed them to the bar Saturday, but it wasn’t us that killed him,” Zakharov said.

Blinken allegedly drank a copious number of spirits, alternating between double shots of horilka, a vodka, and the bar’s signature drink, the “Zelenskyy Cocktail,” advertised “as strong and refreshing as President Zelenskyy.” Having consumed several drinks, Blinken told his entourage he had to use the restroom and would return for another round after he had relieved himself, slurring his words as he spoke. He had difficulty standing, and a Ukraine Security Service agent helped him to his feet and escorted him through the crowd to the bathroom.

The FSB agents, Zakharov said, watched Blinken’s drunken episode from their barstools.

“This filth Blinken was an alcoholic. Even the filth Ukrainians found him offensive. The Kyiv security cleared out the bathroom for him, because, you know, he supposed to be some bigshot VIP. After Blinken pissed, he told his protectors his head hurt and to bring him back to hotel. Our men were watching for an opportunity, but someone, and we don’t know who it is, got to him first,” Zakharov said.

As Blinken’s security led him out of the brick-walled bar toward Khreschatyk Street, where a chauffeured and presumably armored limousine was idling, a person wearing a ski mask and wielding a pistol stepped directly at Blinken and fired three point-blank shots into his chest. The assailant vanished as quickly as he had appeared, dashing to an alley before Blinken’s guards had drawn their weapons. None of them pursued the shooter.

The FSB agents observing the macabre scene witnessed a Kyiv security agent feel for Blinken’s pulse and say, “Vin mertvyy”—he’s dead. Blinken’s useless guards placed his corpse in the limo, which expeditiously fled the scene.

Agent Zakharov said the FSB has no idea who shot Blinken and has no interest in identifying the assassin.

“Someone does our work for us, all the better,” Zakharov said. “He will be the anonymous hero of the Russian Federation.”

After hearing from Zakharov, Real Raw News asked White Hat sources whether they’d intercepted any chatter about Blinken’s assassination.

“Blinken’s been cloned so many times, even if it’s true, and we haven’t picked up a thing, the FSB would have to get the body and check it for signs of a clone. Since the body got whisked away, that seems unlikely,” one source said.

Blinken seems remarkably immune to being assassinated. In June 2023, Chinese officials shot him in the face at Beijing Capital International Airport and declared him dead. Nevertheless, he appeared in Poland three days later.

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