The Arrest of CIA Deputy Director David Cohen

As reported last week, Deputy Director of the Central Intelligence Agency David Cohen was one of two detainees thrown overboard en route to Guam for trying to incite a prisoner revolt. What follows is an account of the investigation that led to his arrest.

On April 3, an envelope arrived at 1100 S Ocean Blvd, Palm Beach, Florida, home to the lawfully elected POTUS, Donald J. Trump. It was similar in appearance to the hundreds of innocuous pieces of correspondence that each day arrived at the front gate and got sorted and screened in a guest house that Trump’s security had adapted into a mailroom—piles of hate mail amid scores of fan letters. Packages were screened for explosives, and white mail was tested for contact poison and toxins such as ricin. The screeners ensured no harmful substances escaped their watchful eyes. Hate mail, however, sometimes reached Trump’s desk, and he routinely shredded offensive letters after reading only a single sentence.

However, a specific letter on April 3 caught the president’s eye and warranted a thorough reading. Allegedly authored by Deputy CIA Director Cohen, the document in excruciating detail defined his hatred of President Trump. It was a six-page schizophrenic screed blaming Trump for every woe the United States had faced since World War II. It attacked not only Donald Trump but also his lineage; Cohen wrote that Trump’s father, Fred, was an associate of Aldrich Ames, who in 1994 was arrested by the FBI for selling American secrets to the KGB during the Cold War. Cohen’s words insinuated that Fred Trump, too, had been a Soviet spy. “Like father, like son,” a sentence read. He wrote, “We should take care of [Trump’s son] Barron now, so he can’t follow in your footsteps, or imperil the United States like Eric and Don Jr. have.” The letter closed with, “Don’t think what happened to the traitor General Berger can’t happen to you and yours,” an allusion to the seven days Gen. Berger spent in the hands of CIA kidnappers in January.

Trump had a graphologist scrutinize the longhand prose. He had seen counterfeits and fakes before. In December 2016, following his resounding defeat over Hillary Clinton, his mailbox was inundated with threatening letters from a person purporting to be Barack Hussein Obama. The script so closely mimicked Obama’s that it fooled two handwriting experts, and only under the inspection of a microscope and infrared scanner were the letters ruled forgeries.

In comparing the Cohen letter against publicly available signatures and memos, Trump’s people were 99.97% certain that Cohen had written the aggressive message.

That percentage increased to 100% when President Donald J. Trump had the White Hat partition of the U.S. military authenticate his findings. The pages and envelope were covered with Cohen’s fingerprints, a 12-point match.

At that point, General Eric M. Smith and his council ruled that the illegitimate CIA deputy director was a clear and present threat to Donald Trump and his family. Threatening the president of the United States is a federal felony under United States Code Title 18, Section 871. It consists of knowingly and willfully mailing or otherwise making “any threat to take the life of, to kidnap, or to inflict great bodily harm upon the president of the United States.”

Gen. Smith also suspected that Cohen had orchestrated the abduction of Gen. Berger.

On April 7, Delta Force operators arrested Cohen in Fairfax County, Virginia. Cohen must have felt invulnerable and untouchable, for he had traveled without protection and had made no attempts to alter his route from home to work at the CIA’s headquarters in McClean, Virginia.

And thus, he must have been shocked shitless when Delta Force surrounded his vehicle in the parking lot of CIA headquarters and gave him a military arrest warrant charging him with treason, aiding and abetting the enemy, and threatening POTUS’ life.

“When Delta confronted him with the charge of threatening the president, Cohen said he didn’t know what they were talking about because he was loyal to Joseph Biden and would never, ever, threaten Biden. Delta then told him they meant Trump, and Cohen murmured something like ‘oh, shit, him’ and reached for a pistol under his jacket,” a source in Gen. Smith’s office told Real Raw News.

A Delta Force operator pistol-whipped Cohen with his sidearm, knocking him unconscious.

Cohen was then taken to GITMO, where he stayed until placed aboard the Arleigh Burke-class destroyer headed to Camp Blaz, Guam. Had he not been thrown overboard and minced by the ship’s screws, he would’ve answered before a military tribunal.